People like to look upon this year with negativity. Obviously, we all know why. An equal cocktail of Covid, racial injustice, and the mad mad mad world of politics. Maybe it all did begin with Kobe….?
However, is it weird to say I had a good year? I know my feelings seemed a bit fucked up, but that is because I am fully capable of enjoying those little things in life. A movie night with pizza and scotch & soda can really block out the negatives of the world. (Mostly scotch)
This is a sequel Birthday post, similar to last years except I am not on 22 hours without sleep and sober. I will tell you now, that without a fact that I am not sober as I type this in the dark of the night, on my Last Day of 29. It is time to this world of my 20 something self. Time to make my thirties the golden years of what is left that was the residue of youth. Time to be….just me.
Over the year of 29 I took a hard look at myself. Looking into human behavior on some intense levels, learning about myself along the way, and the eventual conclusion to truths I could not fathom. I noticed I look into a dark world with a bleak look on it. I am not surprised by the horrors, but I see them as they are and move on. Time enjoy the simple things. Some call it being a Realist, and I see it as me being happy!
I look back on my 20s and smile. The first half were happy and sad all changing by the day. Yes those years were fuzzy (Yeah…) but the end results were the best. The second half were the depressing, failure fueled life. (Dead to me) Fuck those 20’s but they drained me in so many different ways. I say these things and I get really happy!
I HAVE NO CHILDREN!
That is amazing! I see all these people who had kids in their 20’s and I am like “OH HELL NO!” I am so thankful that I do not! (A scare or two has happened) And it is the worse feeling. (I am very happy for my friends that did. You are braver than me!) I do not envy you, nor I ever will. My 20’s were fun for what they could be. I got to live! My Little Tyler’s (Sperm) really did not want to win that race. Isn’t a little weird that every person you know won a race at some point in time. You ask yourself, “How the hell did that person get to the egg?”
My motivation for this year has been amazing! (Some help from social distancing that gave me more time to write) I am writing at a freaky rate. My confidence is growing with the audience that is reading my work. A rejection letter came to me. It was beautiful in a way I will explain at a later date. Being praised for some of my hard work has done wonders to my confidence! I feel unstoppable at times and a wonderful feeling is occurring at times, making me think the stars are finally aligning.
(From The Year 2021) Tyler is wrong! Why did he even say that last year!
In all honesty I am excited for the future. My door is open to everything!
I look back on my early 20’s and see things so different from the person I became. However I regret none of it! Parties on Tuesday nights! Epic bonfires! Memories I made with my brothers/friends , Matthew, Basar, Shaffer, Andrew, Jon, Eric, Dennis, Josh, Zach, and Fat John are literally some of my best! I am glad we got to live. Also riding the Nightrain! How could I forget the first half of my 20’s without mentioning the beverage that defines those early days, of boys in the in between space of manhood. Sitting around a fire with bottles of the Train in their hands. The stuff has been discontinued. The drink from a Guns N Roses song has lived infamous in my mind. Thanks to everyone who road that Train with me!
Late 20’s were mostly boring. I did get to meet several celebs, and I did win my Fantasy Football League last year, so that was some stuff……Of course I am not including some other stuff but that can’t be worded by me.
Part of my always thought that I would die in my 20’s but hey there is still a day left! If I die please put on my tombstone, “He almost made it.” (Make sure to put Nessie’s ashes in my coffin)
It is odd to think I will be in my 30’s. I never really imagined it, but does it really matter? I mean maybe I will have things, a successful career, a wife, children, and the white picket fence our parents always told us about. I will have to say I can’t believe it, but at least I had my 20’s. Holy hell!
I can finally shed the skin of my 20’s and thrive in my 30’s!
In The Spider's Web 